Getting Your Current Self to Your Ideal Self
/If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got. - Henry Ford
Every one of us has goals and desires that we’ve yet to reach. These can be big things from starting our own businesses or starting a career in our respective fields, to small ones like finally clocking a seven minute mile or actually eating all your meal prep instead of ordering in. All of these desires that we’ve thought about, and are actively striving towards (or actively avoiding) combine to form our ideal self. Carl Rogers, the scientist who coined the term, describes the ideal self as everything related to who would like to be; dreams, fears,and everything in between. All over social media, even in professional and academic settings, there’s so much dialogue around striving to be our best(ideal) selves, but not very much actionable advice, until now, I hope.
Getting your current self to your ideal self is difficult, but so extremely satisfying. Not to say I’m at my best self, but I ‘m getting there. And I use the tips below everyday to stay the course.
First, decide what your ideal self does, then find other people that are doing the same thing. And in the information age it so incredibly easy to find those who've gone where you’re headed. Google, YouTube, Instagram, twitter are all vast(and incredible) resources of free information. While all the paths may be different, there will ultimately be a pattern that emerges among the best and brightest in your field. Find that pattern, then take steps to follow it.
Next, examine a typical day in your life, I recommended writing everything down, with time stamps. It sounds cumbersome, because it it. It is also necessary as it’s the most honest and effective way to see your bad habits. When you’ve written down all your waking hours on a typical Tuesday and you realize you’ve spent three of six free hours in an Instagram hole, you realize you do have the time to read a few chapters of that memoir, nightly. Confronting all the time you’ve spent cultivating habits not reflective of your best self, is not easy; I definitely underestimated how much time I was spending on social media, instead of say, Duolingo. It’s so easy to castigate yourself, but the past is already written. Use the disappointment you feel after examining your daily habits as motivation to cultivate habits that serve the purpose of your best self.
Finally, and most important, (especially in today’s climate), the most difficult thing to is to begin. I say especially in today’s climate because so many of us suffer from a false sense of ease due to all the proximity to greatness via social media. Seeing people we know( or follow) start a blog, publish a book, get hired for their dream job…etc., we think “if Janet did that so can I” , which isn’t necessarily untrue. However, we’re seeing multiple great things happen multiple times because everyone, you and I included, are posting the best and brightest moments of our lives. So of course you’re seeing Jordan’s offer letters and skyline views from the Miami Four Seasons. You’re definitely not seeing the countless hours spent editing cover letters and resumes, the extra late nights spent studying/ researching the company, but you can be certain that all that and more preceded the offer letter and the vacations. What we’re all being exposed to so frequently is the culmination of a very lengthy process of incredibly hard and diligent work. Assuming you can decide today to pursue the path Jordan did and get to where he is next week isn’t realistic. But if you analyze your habits, start emulating the successful patterns of successful individuals in your field and begin, today(not next week, or on the first, but today), then yes, truly, your current self and ideal self will be one. When the habits and behaviors of your current self serve your ideal self, also known as self-actualization, great things begin to happen.
Why not start the road to greatness today?
Perfection is the enemy of progress-Winston Churchill
Many thanks to my cousin for reminding me of that and pushing me to finally press publish and share this platform!